Breastfeeding update

I think I’m healing. Finally.

Reducing the number of times I pump each day has allowed enough extra time that I have started to see some progress. I’m sure the ointment switch has helped too.

I am cautiously optimistic about what this means. I don’t want to get too carried away, because once we try Lewis back on the breast he could damage my nipple all over again. But step one in this process is healing, and we can’t move on to step two if we don’t get past step one! So I’m pleased that I may be completing the first step, but I am still not convinced that step two will go well.

We did visit the ENT again today, however. And he said that there is nothing wrong with Lewis’ mouth anymore. The tongue tie has not come back, as nothing has fused back together incorrectly. This is something that I feel 100% optimistic about, no reservations. If his mouth is OK, then that’s one less thing to worry about!

Tomorrow we visit the pediatrician and the baby masseuse/chiropractor. Hoping for happy results there as well. We’re collecting pieces of the puzzle each day, and soon we’ll have a complete picture. I’m very much looking forward to a solution.

Success!

Despite Lewis’ incessant feeding last night, I declare the first night of crib sleeping a success. I might even dare to say that I prefer it. It was quite nice to have everything all in one room, including the baby!

Kyle prefers it as well. He said he liked having our room back, but he liked being able to hear Lewis on the monitor.

Lewis did wet himself out of his diaper last night and soiled the sheets. And he pooped on the changing table too. So I have laundry to do today… but I probably would have had laundry to do anyway! So no big deal, and definitely not a reason to declare defeat.

I think we’ll keep it up with the crib sleeping. Not as scary as it sounded!

Leave it to me to pick the first night of a growth spurt to try crib sleeping for the first time.

Fed him every half hour for 2.5 hours before he would go to sleep. Then I got a 1.5 hour nap in. And now we’re going back to every half hour.

Would be nice to have two working boobs tonight. Or a husband who could breastfeed.

I DID IT. I left him in his crib. He is asleep and he is in his room.

I feel like I have completely abandoned him.

But I also feel like I’ve taken a huge step as a mom, letting go of some of my craziness and anxiety.

And I also feel like a bad mom and a good mom all at the same time.

Sleep well, Lewis. I may not have you for company in our room tonight, but I will definitely have plenty of company from all of my mommy-anxiety instead. So I won’t be lonely. 🙂

Crib time

Currently rocking Lewis to sleep before bed. We’re in the nursery, because I haven’t yet chickened out about him sleeping in his crib for the first time tonight.

Kyle and I both tested the monitor out one more time each… and we are sure it is working.

There is no reason crib sleeping shouldn’t work. Lewis is gonna be great at this. I can only hope that I handle it as well as him.

P.s. Kyle came home during lunch again today. He hung out with Lewis while I showered. I wish I could marry him all over again every single day! What a saint!