When I have a problem, I solve it.
Except that I can’t solve my sleep-deprivation/exhaustion problem. Instead, it keeps getting worse.
It is so bad now, that my whole body is out of whack. I don’t know for sure that it is all related, but this list of ailments keeps growing: I can’t eat, I feel nauseous, I can’t focus my gaze, I keep getting bruises, my breathing is strange, I have cramps in my belly, headaches, can’t kick my cold….
The longer the list gets, the more desperately I’m searching for a solution. But I have very few functioning brain cells to use in the search for a solution. So trying just seems to make me feel even more tired.
It seems that Lewis has his top 4 front teeth coming in simultaneously. He is handling it wonderfully, except that he doesn’t sleep. Even if we give him Tylenol. They better come through fast.
I wish the world cared more about the fact that moms are so tired. As anti-feminist as it sounds… I totally want special treatment. This is not a normal situation, so I feel like I shouldn’t be expected to perform normally. But no one gives a shit. No one can help me, and no one cares. I feel very alone in my misery. And being so tired makes that feeling of isolation quite difficult to handle.