19 weeks

Another week, another picture of me and The Wild Child. (S)he is a whole half a foot tall now, according to the weekly emails I get. Wowee!! Little Crazy Pants is still having a party in there, often being the first to alert me that I need to pee with a swift blow to the bladder. It’s impossible to know what itty bitty body part is making impact, so Kyle and I have been having a good time guessing at whether we’re dealing with a kick, a punch, a headbang, or a twerk. Based upon the number of impacts I feel, I’m guessing it is all four at all times!

I also feel like my stomach popped! this week. I have been feeling enormous around the middle, which is both alarmingly sudden, and wonderfully longed-for. I love looking and feeling round and pregnant! My belly button is beginning to flatten out, usually at its flattest after the massive lunches I eat every day. With Lewis, the flattening freaked me out. But this time around, I’m much more comfortable with it since I’ve seen it once before.

The only downside to the popped! belly is that I can’t comfortably lean forward, or even sit up straight, at my desk. The squeezing of the uterus that happens is just downright unpleasant, so I end up leaned back or reclined all day long, which ultimately doesn’t feel so great on my back. Why don’t I remember this from last time?!

My appetite is quite varied – normal in the mornings for breakfast, HUGE for lunches, and then pretty small at dinner time. I’ve been letting my cravings and my hunger be my guide, and eating according to how ravenous I am. I figure that my small dinners average out with my huge lunches, and my body seems to be satisfied with getting what it is asking for.

Sometimes listening to my body can be a little bit of an oopsies – I did end up buying way too many sweets at the grocery store the other day – ice cream, cupcakes, and two kinds of cookies. It felt very naughty to buy all of it, but I couldn’t resist! It does seem that the simple act of buying them was enough to satisfy me on some level, because I haven’t been devouring them at a rapid rate – thank goodness! It just feels good to have them there, and I get to treat myself once (or twice!) a day with a little bit of sweetness. Other than that, cravings have been minimal this past week. I still enjoy rice quite a lot, and on Friday I had to have a shrimp burrito (with rice, duh!), but mostly it is actually quite difficult to find something that sounds good at all. Especially at dinner time!

Lewis has been a delight this week. He’s been sleeping again (good naps AND nights!), talking, joking, eating a bunch, and has generally been easy to be around and take care of. In the land of toddlers, we’ll take it while we can get it, and we’ll treasure every moment.

This is his last week at his current daycare, which feels very bittersweet. The nerves ahead of the switch aren’t subsiding, but I don’t really expect them to until a week or two after Lewis has started at his new daycare and time has proven that everything is OK. That’s how it always is with something new with kiddo – I am super duper anxious until everything turns out ok and then I go, “hmm… why was I so nervous about that? that was no big deal”.

Work has been intense for both me and Kyle lately, with no end to the madness in sight. I think we’re both doing our best to find ways to disconnect and relax and be present in our family whenever possible, and it seems to be working pretty well. We even had a date night last night, which felt positively luxurious!

Moments to relax and calm our minds and be together are always important, but it feels extra critical lately. Kyle needs those moments to de-stress from deadlines and pressure, and I need them to keep my body from getting overloaded. I’ve noticed that I’m quick to tire, and that manifests itself in physical discomfort.

On Friday, for example, I was so busy with work that I forgot to drink water the most of the day, and I ended up dehydrated which led to Braxton Hicks contractions. That totally caught me off guard and was extremely uncomfortable. I have also been having round ligament pain, which has been both a dull ache and stabby, shooting pain that goes from my belly button to my crotch occasionally too. It doesn’t take much to throw off my delicate balance, so I’m trying to be more mindful to hydrate, reduce my expectations of how much I can accomplish in a day, and get sleep/rest so I can feel physically well.

That about sums it up. We’re cruising towards halfway, and next Tuesday we find out boy vs. girl. I could not be more excited for that revelation. And Kyle gets a sly smile when we talk about it, too. I can tell it is giving him butterflies to imagine who is in my belly. Can’t wait!!!

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