The thing about pregnancy…

…is that you’re hyper-aware of your body.

When you’re not pregnant, the only time you really take notice of what is going on with your body is when something is wrong. In general, you don’t have to think about it. You just are. You just exist.

Especially now, in the end stages of my pregnancy, I am constantly distracted by the various things my body is doing. It is, without exception, always up to something.

The baby might be moving. And if he isn’t, your hip might be hurting. And if your hip is fine, maybe your back is spasming. And if that’s all good for the moment, you’re probably contracting. And if you aren’t doing that, then your feet are probably swollen and aching in your shoes. Or you’re probably sweating profusely. Or you’ve got some sweet carpal tunnel going on. Or your skin is probably itching on your boobs. Or you’ve got heartburn. Or you can’t take a full breath. Or your nose is bleeding. Or you’re nauseous. Or you’ve got restless leg. Or you need to pee. Or you’re starving (probably for something very specific and nothing else will do!!).

Anyway. I’m not trying to complain. My point is that I was just sitting here in awe of how quickly you get used to constantly taking signals from your body. How quickly all of that becomes normal. So normal, in fact, that you almost forget about what it was like to not constantly be reading body-data.

Isn’t that amazing? Isn’t it fascinating that our minds allow us to make this kind of adjustment so that pregnancy isn’t completely torturous?

People ask you how you’re feeling, and you can honestly answer that you’re feeling fine. At the same time, if they asked you what pregnancy symptoms you were experiencing, you’d have a list a mile long. But somehow, “I’m feeling fine, thank you!” is still something you can say and mean.

But if you weren’t pregnant, and you were feeling all of those things, you’d never be able to say you were fine with a straight face. “Normal” has been completely redefined to accommodate this abnormal experience.

That’s pretty cool.

NURSERY!!!!!!

The time has arrived! THE NURSERY REVEAL! We finished up the last little details this morning. Get ready for a lengthy post showing (off) everything! We don’t really have a “theme”, necessarily. In true Carolyn fashion, the point was the colors – Navy, Red and Orange. 

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  • We’ll start off with the chair. Grammy (Kyle’s mom) and Grandpa Tom were kind enough to gift us the chair and ottoman, which both swivel and rock. Or I guess technically, they glide
  • You’ll also see one of the hand-me-down side tables that we painted, ready for the 4th generation in a row to use. 
  • The little bookshelves were just put up this morning by my sweet husband. 
  • The artwork that I made from a canvas, a piece of fabric and a staple gun is hanging proudly above the chair.
  • You can also see a partial glimpse of the rocking moose and the curtains. The rocking moose was a shower gift, which we love and which niece Peri has tested and approved. The curtains were custom made by me and Grammy back when we first moved in, and they were part of the inspiration for picking Navy as the main nursery color.
  • The boppy is there waiting for many, many baby meals. 
  • The white thing on the side table is a white noise machine. I’m sure it will be a life saver. For now, we’ve been enjoying the Mozart setting as we work in the nursery. 
  • And then there is the LAMP. Which I love. It is the first real, non-IKEA lamp I’ve ever bought. It feels like we’ve entered a new level of adultness with that lamp. Or maybe the new level of adultness comes from having a baby…? Naw, it is the lamp. 
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This angle is panned to the right from the last one, just on the other side of the window.

  • The amazing crib was gifted by Nonny and Pop Pop (my mom and stepdad). Pop Pop even built it! 
  • The painting is from our brother-in-law. He painted it originally for Kyle’s man cave, but when we converted this room into the nursery, it got to stay. And it serves as the inspiration for the red and orange additions to the color scheme.
  • The quilt in the crib is from Grammy. There are also a couple little lovies waiting in there for Baby Boy.
  • The second side table is next to the crib for the humidifier (the weird orange thing), and both parts of the baby monitor.
  • We also hung the lion backpack that I couldn’t live without. We’ll use it to transport stuff back-and-forth to daycare. We feel like the lion is Baby Boy’s mascot. “Lewis the Lion” has such a nice ring to it! So hopefully he comes out looking like a Lewis so we can stick with that name.
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Here is a close-up of the corner of the crib. Mostly to show you the pattern on the crib sheets, which we got from Kyle’s sister. LOVE the arrows.

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Up above the crib we repurposed a decoration from one of the baby showers. It says “Baby Knees”, and it is made out of little onesies and tiiiiiiiiiny clothespins.

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For this picture, we scanned to the right again. We’re now on the third wall of the nursery, with the second window to the left of the dresser. The diaper genie is under the window, and the door to the closet is on the same wall as the dresser, off to the right. The closet holds a shelf with extra diapers, extra sheets, and the laundry basket tower.

  • In this picture is the dresser, which was also gifted to us by Nonny and Pop Pop, along with Great Granny (my mom’s mom). Kyle built it over the course of two days, and it is AWESOME. It is big enough to hold absolutely everything. We’ve got all our diaper gear in there, clothes, toys, blankets, jammies, etc. 
  • The changing pad is ready for diaper duty, covered in the same fabric as the crib mattress.
  • The red shelf has a couple pairs of super sweet shoes (nikes and converse), some stuffed animals, some Swedish Dalahorses, some miniature books, and other knicknacks.
  • The lantern was a christmas gift from Grammy to me. I bought a flameless candle for inside, and now it is a nightlight!
  • Baby Darth and his death star balloon were a gift from my sweet friend Sarah. This is easily Kyle’s favorite thing in the whole nursery. It is definitely up there for me too.
  • The clock is for me to keep track of late night feedings. You’ll notice that even the clock follows the color scheme. 🙂
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This is our cat. She loves the rug. We also love the rug, so here is a picture of it! It is relatively high-pile, which we thought would be good for Baby to play on, since it has a really nice texture and he might like to touch it.

That’s it! Our beautiful nursery!

1 Month Away

My due date is exactly 1 month from today.

ONE MONTH.

That is really, really soon. I mean, labor could commence at any moment! Or it could wait for weeks. We just don’t know.

As a planner, not knowing when this is going to happen is kind of messing with my brain a little bit. I know we’re “ready” for it whenever, but normally I schedule things. So it is a huge adjustment to let myself be swept away in the uncertainty of something this momentous.

But like I said… we’re “ready”.

I mean… we’re ready in the sense that we’ve got the nursery set up, the baby gear all acquired, the car seat bases in the cars, and above all else – we’re excited. But, I guess you never really know if you’re ready. Because how can you know for sure if you’re prepared for something that you haven’t experienced before?

And a month is a very short amount of time, really. Think of how many months you’ve lived through before. How many times you’ve counted down to something that was a month away. How fast those months went by.

ONE MONTH until absolutely everything is different. ONE MONTH until my body has to do something so hard I can’t even imagine what it will feel like. ONE MONTH until it isn’t about us anymore. ONE MONTH until the fatigue I’m feeling now is made trivial by a whole new kind of fatigue. ONE MONTH until this squirmy little human living inside of me that I feel like I know on some abstract level becomes an actual, real, squirmy little human that I can touch and feel and actually will know. And who depends on us for absolutely everything, because he will be totally helpless.

ONE MONTH.

Wow. Wrap your mind around that if you can.

Pregnancy Must-Haves

As I near the “end” of my pregnancy (less than 8 weeks to go!), I have been reflecting on the experience. There are as many unique pregnancy experiences as there have been pregnancies, but as I have navigated my own, I’ve relied a lot on the women who came before me to put information out into the world about what I might expect.

Without them sharing their own experiences, I would have had to wing this on my own. Even though the tips and tricks and heads-ups from my friends and that I found on the internet didn’t all apply to me, inevitably I found someone who had already experienced what I was going through and had just the right solution.

Even though this blog is usually a self-centered documentation of my day-to-day experiences, and certainly isn’t an “advice” blog, I’m hoping to be able to pay it forward by posting my own list of “pregnancy must-haves”. This list is unique to my experience, but maybe someone will find it in their own desperate search for answers and something on it will be exactly what they needed. If that person is you… welcome to the sisterhood! I’ve linked to anything that can be linked to, so if you want to go all-in and copy me, you’ve got an easy way to do it!

Carolyn’s Pregnancy Must-Haves:

Wearables

  • Old Navy Jeans – A lot of people I talked to, and a lot of people on the internet, hate maternity jeans. Not I. Oh no – I have loved my maternity jeans. Especially since I’m allowed to wear jeans at work. They have spelled comfort for me in a very uncomfortable time. I went for the cheapest available option, and I’ve been in maternity jeans since… 8 or 10 weeks in? I bought two pairs – one in dark blue, and one in black. Old Navy is great because they always have a sale going on so you don’t have to break the bank. My preference ended up being the full-panel style, but Old Navy has the low-rise and the side-panel options too. My advice? Embrace the maternity jeans as soon as you’re uncomfortable in regular clothes.
  • Old navy tanks – The rib-knit tanks from Old Navy are God’s gift to pregnant women. They’re soft, comfortable, come in a million colors, and can be had for $5 each if you catch the right sale. I wear one every day under whatever top I’m wearing.
  • Yoga pants – No surprise, I went to Old Navy for these, too. Because of the cheap-factor (duh!). But no matter where you choose to get them, get a pair. I got the full-panel version of these as well, because that’s the most comfortable for me. If I could live in them every day forever, I would. They’re even coming to the hospital with me when the baby comes, so I can wear them home.
  • A few nice things to wear – I mostly went with basic clothing items. But check out Pink Blush Maternity for some fun things. They usually have a good sale going on, and the clothes are generally very trendy. I couldn’t imagine 9 months of solid colored t-shirts, because I didn’t want to look as blah as I felt. It really lifted my spirits to have something fun to put on in the morning.
  • $10 Target Bras – Your boobs will explode when you’re pregnant. Right away. And then they won’t stop. For this reason, I found getting the cheapest possible bra worked for me so I could replace it each time I grew out of the last one without sweating the expense too much. Nothing beats $10, and I found some that I liked at Target. It turns out that the ones I liked were in the Junior section, and they only go up to 38D. But that worked for me. Bras are very important for comfort, though. So if you can’t find a cheap bra that feels good, definitely
    splurge. Just plan on splurging several times as you keep growing.
  • Sports bras If you’re used to sleeping bra-less, a comfy sports bra can be helpful for sleeping when your boobs start to get out of control. I know it is
    physically impossible, but I sometimes felt like I was tangled in my own
    flesh when I tried to roll over in bed at night. Throwing on a sports bra solved that
    problem immediately. These will also be handy if you start to leak
    during the latter stages of your pregnancy. I liked the cheapo ones from
    target, but go for whatever solves your problems. Like I said, splurging on your
    breasts is a great idea.
  • Honeydew Undies
    – Comfort wins again. Toss
    your thongs into the “pre-pregnancy clothes” bins and pull them out
    again after your body is recovered from birth. Replace them with some
    comfortable full-butted undies for pregnancy. I hear postpartum will
    require an entirely different philosophy for underpants, but for
    pregnancy I really loved the Honeydew undies. I got my first ones as a
    gift from my sister-in-law for my bachelorette party. They’re super
    duper soft, and super cute too. It can be a real boost to find a way to
    comfortable AND feel cute at the same time during pregnancy. The real
    bonus of the Honeydew brand, though, is that they have lace trim,
    which means there isn’t a terribly harsh underwear line when you wear your comfy yoga pants or a dress. They’re almost as good
    as thongs on that front.
  • Sperry Angelfish Boat Shoes – Even if you have a loving partner who would move heaven and earth for
    you, you’re going to find yourself home alone at some point, staring at
    your shoes, preparing for battle. Do yourself a favor – get yourself
    some slip-on shoes. And do yourself a double-favor – make sure they’re
    cute. I love Sperrys. I have two pairs – tan, and black with gold polka
    dots. Since getting too big to comfortably reach my feet, I haven’t worn
    anything else.

Edibles

  • Dry Vanilla Bean Soda – This is pregnant lady crack. It has less sugar than a traditional soda (by a LOT), which also translates to less calories. Plus it is all-natural and only has 4 ingredients. Basically, it is a lower-guilt way to get some bubbles, feel celebratory, and satisfy a sweet tooth. I’ve loved these on holidays especially, because having something special makes me feel included. The downside is, it really is less sweet, so if you’re really really craving sugar, it might not do the trick. And it is also ridiculously expensive. But for a special occasion, I have splurged. And sometimes a bottle of it can turn around an entire day for me.
  • Food as medicine – Especially in my first trimester, food was not for fun. Food was medicine. I ate to keep myself from being nauseous,
    mostly. For me, that meant potatoes, cheetoes, and saltine crackers (i.e. CARBS!!!).
    Later in my pregnancy, “food as medicine” turned into looking at food as
    a way to get all the nourishment my baby needed. I figured out what
    things I was not good at getting in my normal diet (cookies aren’t a
    great source of anything nutritious, it turns out), and I kept things on-hand to
    fill in the blanks. Important things like protein, calcium, fruit, and
    iron were particularly difficult for me. So I stocked up on items like
    100% fruit juice, peanut butter, eggs, milk, etc. I think every pregnant
    lady should make a short-list of the items she is absolutely not
    allowed to run out of under any conditions (probably with the advice of a doctor), and keep
    those things on-hand at all times. They can be nutrition-boosters,
    nausea-fighters, or craving-satisfiers. But we’ve all got something that
    we must have at home to keep ourselves feeling good and growing a healthy baby. Use food as a tool.

Hygiene

  • Kotex panty linersPregnancy is not glamorous. Get some of these.
  • Kleenex From the very beginning, my nose was super stuffy and runny. And then came the nosebleeds. I have tissues by my TV-watching
    chair, by my bed, in the bathroom, in my purse, at my desk at work, in my car, and
    in the pockets of every coat I own. Even if you somehow avoid the stuffy
    nose, you might find yourself crying at anything and everything. So
    keep tissues everywhere.
  • Breath mints – Not only did I have hunger-induced nausea during my first trimester, but you may recall that I had a horrible sour
    taste in my mouth all day long too. If I didn’t have food or a breath
    mint in my mouth, I was miserable. Go get yourself some breath mints,
    girlfriend. Even if you don’t have the sour taste problem, you might be
    puking. So you’ll want these.
  • Pedicures – Long before
    it became impossible to touch my toes, it was uncomfortable
    to touch my toes. There is something about squishing your uterus that is
    just downright unpleasant. So even though I could have put my own shoes on and cut my own toenails much longer than I did, I didn’t want to.
    And if I don’t want to squish my uterus, that’s my choice. And since my
    husband drew the line at helping me with my shoes, I have been getting
    regular pedicures to tame the talons on my toesies. Worth. Every. Penny.

Sleep

  • Easy to wash 100% cotton bedspread – With your hormones raging, you’re probably going to get sweaty. Or maybe your breasts will leak. Or you’ll get a nosebleed. Or you’ll blow your nose in the middle
    of the night and the tissue won’t hold. Just take my word for it…
    there is going to be a reason that you will want to be able to wash your
    bedding easily. And stuffing a king-size blanket into a duvet cover
    when I’m large and pregnant is a) exhausting, and b) the worst thing
    I’ve ever had to do. Plus, synthetics and down aren’t breathable enough to keep the sweating at bay. Get a simple cotton bedspread. Trust me.
  • Extra pillow – For aches and
    pains and general sleep discomforts, there are a million different kinds
    of pillows you can sleep with out there. I was given a crazy weird pregnancy body pillow
    that I thought I’d love early on. And upon first trying it, I did love it. FOR
    NAPS. But for a full night of sleep, that thing was a demon. It was too
    huge for me to be able to roll over, and there was no way for me to use
    my beloved regular pillow for my head while using the gigantic pillow,
    so I ended up with a crick in my neck. I abandoned it and slept without a
    body pillow for most of my pregnancy. But in my 3rd trimester, I have
    encountered those typical aches and pains, and I found that the
    simplistic approach to the pillow-assist was the best for me. I took a
    normal pillow, and shoved it between my legs. The end. I sleep way
    better now. But whatever size/style of pillow you end up liking, I would
    bet money that you’re going to want something.

Technology

  • babylist registry – I wish I could work for them. That’s how much I love their online
    registry. You can register for anything from anywhere on the internet. I
    hated the idea of being confined to what they sell at one or two
    stores. Because when it comes to my baby and his gear, I wanted to read every single review I
    could find, and pick accordingly. And sometimes the thing you like best
    isn’t available at Babies R Us! The other great thing about babylist is
    that you can add gift cards and favors to your registry, not just
    material items. You can really customize it to your exact needs!
  • Weekly Pregnancy Emails – I love getting these
    every Friday (if you sign up, you’ll get them on the first day of each new week of your pregnancy). They were especially fun in the early weeks of pregnancy,
    because a lot was changing with the baby, and the emails told you about
    all the stuff you couldn’t see. Now, towards the end, the baby is
    mostly just getting fatter, so they’re more geared towards what is going
    on with my pregnant body. But I still get an update on the baby’s size
    every week, which I love. My favorites are:
  • Over App – I have been labeling my weekly photos with this app on my phone. The
    app also creates its own folder in my photos on my phone, so I can
    conveniently scroll through my pregnancy week-by-week without any of my
    cat pictures getting in the way. I’m going to treasure the photos forever. And I
    can’t wait to show my future children what their mama looked like while
    they were growing inside of me.
  • My own blog – Pregnancy is tough. Everyone is going to find their own coping mechanisms. For me, documenting everything in this blog has been life-saving. It helps me sort through my
    thoughts, keep track of my progress, and keep the all-important sense of
    humor alive. Plus it is a wonderful way to share the experience with my
    loved ones (near and far!) without having to write a million emails and
    make a million phone calls. And I look forward to having this record of
    my pregnancy forever, so I can come back and reflect on the experience
    long after the memories have been filed away in the deepest recesses of
    my brain.
  • Budget spreadsheet + schedule Oooh my never-ending love affair with my budget and my schedule. Maybe you’re not as neurotic as I am,
    but maybe you are. Whatever… I needed to budget endlessly and work off
    of a schedule in order to feel in control of myself. It has worked for
    me. It has made my pregnancy easier. And I recommend giving it a try. It might just make income-less maternity leave and nursery preparations feel less daunting. I know it did for me.

Non-Tangibles

  • Childbirth class – WORTH EVERY PENNY. Make your husband/partner go with you. You can research the birth process like crazy online (I know I did!) and you will still learn something new in class. And the peace of mind that comes with having your questions answered is priceless. We did it through our local hospital, and it was under $100. Just spend the money.
  • People – I cannot say enough about the people I have in my life and the roles they’ve played in my pregnancy. They’ve been every kind of support I’ve needed. You’re going to want people too. To help you put on your shoes, plan a baby shower for you, let you cry about stupid things, comfort you when you’re scared, celebrate the milestones with you, share the baby kicks with, come with you to appointments, feed you when you have no energy, etc. If the people don’t just come out of the woodwork for you, or you’re a transplant with little-to-no family/friends in the area… find some people. You’re going to need people. Go to a class, or pregnancy yoga, or a mommy group. There are people there that you may bond with for life. And maybe they need people too.
  • Sense of Humor – I would never have gotten through my pregnancy without a sense of humor. You give your body over to this process, and it goes on autopilot. You’re just along for the ride, with no say in most of what happens to you. If you let the lack of control and the changes upset you, you’ll be upset the whole time. Very early on, I decided that I would be amused instead. I don’t succeed 100% of the time, but making that my intention from the start meant that I was able to keep a positive attitude more often than not. This has made the roller coaster of pregnancy fun (for the most part) instead of torturous. And I think my sweet husband has been grateful that I’ve been willing to laugh my way through it with him, too.

A favorite moment from Saturday’s gender reveal party. Captured by my lovely sister-in-law.

We’re still riding the high today. Thinking about Baby Boy all the time and wondering what he’ll be like. We love him to pieces already!

Here I am at 19 weeks! As I write this, the baby is kicking me. It is like he/she knows I’m talking about him/her. 🙂 almost halfway and a week away from finding out the sex!

Here I am at 17 weeks. 🙂 heard the heartbeat at the doctor yesterday, and now I’m waiting to feel the first movement. Rumor has it it is possible to start feeling anytime now. We’ll see! 

Spicy cauliflower and green beans. Holy heartburn! What was I thinking?! I even get heartburn from ice water nowadays. This was a deliciously stupid idea. #pregnant

Here I am at 15 weeks! Different background this week because I’m in Austin and Kyle didn’t feel like taking my picture at 4 am this morning before I left (weird, I know). I am feeling good. And plump. 🙂