After my wonderful birthday yesterday, it was time for part 2: taking myself shopping. My mom and I hit the stores while Kyle stayed home with Lewis. I fed Lewis and pumped before I left so I could maximize time away.
Mom and I had a great time together, as always. She’s always my favorite shopping buddy! With our busy lives, we don’t get nearly enough time together. So today was very special.
I got a few of the things on my list, but I was surprised to find out that I’m not as big a fan of my “new and improved” body as I thought. I thought I was ready to overhaul my wardrobe because I was starting to feel good in my new shape. But I was pretty unsatisfied with how most of the clothes fit and rejected nearly everything I tried on. I guess I need to do a little more to truly feel good in my skin. Until then, I at least have a few more things to wear that make me feel fabulous! I just didn’t get to shop like crazy like I’d planned. My wallet is pleased.
The strangest part of the day was how panicked I started to feel towards the end of our outing. My breasts were starting to fill up, I had heard from Kyle that he was trying to put Lewis down for a nap, and I suddenly felt completely guilty for not being there, as well as freaked out that I had no way to empty my breasts. I needed to get home asap.
So mom and I power walked through the mall to hit a few last stores as I babbled about working through the guilt, zig zagging around the crowd. And then I got my butt home.
As soon as I walked through the door I felt like I could breathe again. The relief was unbelievable, and also very confusing.
Funny thing was, Lewis was asleep when I got home! So he didn’t even need me for another hour. And guess what… my boobs didn’t explode. Imagine that.
I’m not sure why I was so overcome today. I always miss Lewis, but that was extreme. I was very emotional yesterday too, having a little happy-cry on the couch before my family arrived for dinner, just thinking about how great they are. So maybe I’m hormonal and it is messing with me. My emotions are very intense lately!